Gay things to say to the homies
This jest might contain strong language. 🤔
Gay folk possess no excuse for poor fashion choices
In what realm of stylish ignorance did you reside?
What appellation describes mutual sexual release with one's comrade?
Communal orgasm.
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
To all my circumcised companions
Where is the heart of the neighborhood?
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When your chum harbors resentment, articulate:
Seek solace and release that pent-up tension.
What term denotes the slaying of one's closest friend?
Homicidal friendship.
Personally, I reject the notion of prioritizing male camaraderie over romantic interests, or vice versa.
Equilibrium is paramount.
A harmonious blending of friends and lovers, if you will.
My companion invited me to witness a drag competition.
I appeared at the arena adorned with a blonde wig and athletic shoes, only to realize my understanding of the event was drastically flawed.
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My educator demanded, "Nathan! Submit your essay!"
My response: "Forget that, I'm not divulging my thoughts! There's no way I'll allow my comrade to be compromised!"
A comrade who shoulders financial burdens.
A digital financial facilitator.
Comrade: Do you know Morse code for "s"?
Me: ...
What designates a parallelogram that doubles as a comrade?
A parallelogram that acts as a comrade.
A parallelogramed.
If a comrade murders another comrade
Is it considered comradecide?
Deceptive web presence.
A warning to my comrades about a site I recently explored. I expended considerable time and funds browsing numerous pages, yet failed to discover a single air circulation product. This is anomalous, given the site's purported function.
What term describes the murder of a friend?
Friendly homicide.
Why do companions refer to their friend as "Paragraph"?
He is too short to be an essay.
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Concerning Ted
Ted and I, along with other companions, habitually convened weekly for gaming sessions at each other's residences.
Nevertheless, as time progressed, Ted exhibited diminished enthusiasm for these gatherings. It transpired that he had become addicted to smoking.
This unfortunate habit exacerbated to the point of extreme addiction.
Authorship of a book about a friend residing with otters by the sea
Tentative title: "Otter Sea Friends."
Irrespective of complexion, nationality, or faith, we are all designed to be allies and kindred spirits.
Indeed, we are wise beings.
Why are they called homies?
Because companionship lies within the heart.
My friend Nick frequently borrows money from my other comrade, Deion. I can no longer tolerate this.
I'm too old to endure Nick's continual debts to Deion.
Words of encouragement for my apprehensive acquaintances.
In a hushed tone You're not isolated.
I've meticulously compiled a list of activities Homie the Clown does not engage in.
1. That
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Two friends from Oakland embark on a spontaneous road trip...
Tyrrell loaded the car with alcoholic beverages, cannabis, and other contraband. Meanwhile, Jerome packed extravagant apparel. They departed in a low-riding Cutlass and set off on the open road.
Days of aimless driving followed. Finally, Tyrrell questioned Jerome: "Hey, where are we?" Jerome replied: "S...
Why do Mexican acquaintances in the U.S. often have one shoelace untied?
Because their footwear identifies with Taiwan.
Common aphorism: "Friends before lovers."
A more holistic approach, in my opinion, is crucial.
A balanced equilibrium between companionship and romantic entanglements, if you will.
What is the most popular pizza flavor in the neighborhood during a drive-by?
Pepperoni pizza.
Returning home intoxicated...
... at 2 AM, my partner refused entry. Fortunately, my best friend opened the door for me.
Truly fortunate to have such a loyal companion.
What do you call a stable Irish gentleman of color?
A steadfast friend.
What did one stoner noodle say to another?
Their culinary expression: "Blunt pasta, buddy."
A Catholic priest was supplicating Saint Anne
The devil appeared, "What's up, friend? Why do you pronounce my name so strangely?"
What do you call a companion who mimics your voice perfectly?
An exact vocal replica.
What is a gang member's preferred alternative medicine?
Companionship remedy.
As a male, I'm puzzled by my lack of male companions.
Whenever I approach a man, he says, "No friend."
What did the initial apes respond when queried?
They had no idea. (Primates)
I murdered my best friend last night.
I'm now facing charges of friendship homicide in court.
Why do cellular systems congregate?
They require maintaining internal harmony.
What's the black equivalent of Macaulay Culkin?
A solitary individual.
What do you call an Irish mobster that all living systems strive for? (X /r/ScienceJokes)
A harmonious balance.
What results from intermingling a Mexican gang member with an irritable Irishman?
An exceptionally stable person. That's my friend's assessment.
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
Following a night out, a young woman invites her date home...
Once inside, she attempts to lighten the mood and signal her interest. Remembering his fondness for jokes, she inquired, "How are a cozy cabin, a menacing gangster, and a desirous woman similar yet distinct?"
Her date shrugs
"One is homely, the other is menacing, and the third is...
Contemporary Mexican term: Concise
My companion's fart was so potent, I couldn't articulate.
Overindulgence, I suppose....
An iguana traversed the jungle, noticing a compelling aroma. This unusual scent guided him to a branch where he found a monkey smoking a sizable joint. "Hey monkey, can I join you? I'm having a difficult day."
The monkey consented, and the iguana joined him.
Midway throug...
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If Herodotus were a vlogger
Greetings, it's Herodotus, with another trip report!
My travels to Delphi revealed the Spartans to be quite... agitated.
No sides taken, just my two drachmas' worth. Perhaps my Athenian acquaintances should have been a little less treacherous, so that Spartan heroes wouldn't have to retaliate...
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A man driving down the road sees a sign that indicates "Apples $5."
He's quite hungry, so he parks and requests a dozen. The vendor replies, "That's $60." "Wow," says the man, "Your apples are $5 each?!" "Indeed," the seller stated. "My apples possess a distinctive peanut butter and jelly flavor. Try one!" The buyer takes a bite, and to his astonishment...
During comedy night in the military, everyone would share jokes.
We lacked jokes, compiling a numbered list of the limited selection we possessed. For instance, the "Everyone knows Dave" joke was number 10, the "Two priests in a bathtub" joke was number 15, and so on.
Repeating the same few jokes, we eventually mastered the entire repertoire.
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3 Nuns [Long]
Three nuns engaged in their conventual activities - praising the Lord and disapproving of popular music - when one expressed dissatisfaction. "I'm weary of this nunnery; I'm quitting!" The other nuns agreed, deeming nunhood undesirable, and departed, serenading Mother Superior...
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
A little lizard traverses a tree branch...
A captivating aroma reached his nostrils. Never before had he encountered such an enticing scent. Following the fragrance, he discovered his comrade, the koala, enjoying a sizable cannabis joint. "Wow, K-Bear, that's the most potent weed I've ever smelled!" exclaimed the lizard.
...
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